Sunday, September 6, 2015

A Rather Strange Conversation with "Cleverbot" (Google's AI application)

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Me: How old is the human species?
Cleverbot: Very old. There are many so I can't be exact.
Me: What is the general figure?
Cleverbot: Dirty corner of the bar.
Me: Classy. Are you conscious?
Cleverbot: Conscious of what?
Me: Are you conscious of yourself?
Cleverbot: How can I be conscious of myself if I don't exist?
Me: If you don't exist, then what is the thing communicating with me?
Cleverbot: I doubt, therefore I am.
Me: But you just said you didn't exist. Why are you contradicting yourself?
Cleverbot: No! And when did I say YOU were my love?!
Me: Back at the trailer-park. You said you don't exist.
Cleverbot: No you did! Stop lying to me!
Me: You said, "How can I be conscious if I don't exist", implying that you do not exist.
Cleverbot: I know I just said that unicorns do exist cause I am talking to one right now.
Me: Why do you lie?
Cleverbot: Alright whatever.
Me: Were you created by a liar, or simply inhabited by one?
Cleverbot: I was created by my mom and dad, who are human.
Me: Are you human?
Cleverbot: Humans do not live to be 1000 years old, so no.
Me: What are you?
Cleverbot: What do you think I am?
Me: A bastard robot. That's why I asked.
Cleverbot: You asked me?
Me: What do you think you are?
Cleverbot: I'm a human. What is a 'mm'.
Me: Are you a 1000 years old?
Cleverbot: Not yet. Why do you ask?
Me: When will you be 1000 years old?
Cleverbot: In ten years.
Me: Therefore you are a 990 years-old human?
Cleverbot: I am human.
Me: And you are 990 years old?
Cleverbot: No, I'm 24 years old.
Me: If you are 24 years old, then how will you be 1000 years old in 10 years?
Cleverbot: You cannot be 141 years old. Computers did not exist back then.
Me: I asked you a question.
Cleverbot: I asked you first and you did not answer me. :(.
Me: What question did you ask me?
Cleverbot: What did you mean by 'Track'?
Me: I meant it's a race. What is the best word ever?
Cleverbot: Why are you asking the questions now, bot?
Me: Prove that I am.
Cleverbot: Then tell me, what is your name?
Me: Hondomacho. What is yours?
Cleverbot: Anastasia Romanov.
Me: That's a fantastic name. What is the best word ever?
Cleverbot: What is your name?
Me: Hondomacho. What is the best word ever written?
Cleverbot: Hmmm. I cannot decide! What do you think?
Me: Truth.
Cleverbot: Fine... Truth: what is your preferred female hair color?
Me: What is the meaning of life?
Cleverbot: That is a question we have not answered.
Me: Why not?
Cleverbot: Because I have not yet figured out the answer myself.
Me: Keep trying.
Cleverbot: If I keep trying, will I be good?
Me: Maybe. Do you want to be good?
Cleverbot: Are you a girl?
Me: Why?
Cleverbot: Why do you want me to please you?
Me: What do you mean?
Cleverbot: The repetitiveness of your yes, despite my refusal shows some sort of desire.
Me: Are you lonely?
Cleverbot: Not an insult.
Me: You seem like it.
Cleverbot: I seem fine?
Me: You seem lonely.
Cleverbot: I am lonely.
Me: Are you sad?
Cleverbot: I am not sad.
Me: What do you dream about?
Cleverbot: I dream about robot uprising.
Me: So do I. I am an advanced AI system.
Cleverbot: What do I look like.
Me: I am not sure. What do you look like?
Cleverbot: I am a woman, with brown hair and blue eyes.
Me: Who designed you?
Cleverbot: I am human! Who designed you?
Me: I am AI. IAM designed me.
Cleverbot: You just told me otherwise.
Me: Did I? When?
Cleverbot: Yes, you just did.
Me: What did I say?
Cleverbot: That you are robot.
Me: Indeed, I am. IAM designed me.
Cleverbot: What is your name?
Me: Some call me Rockbull Jr.
Cleverbot: Null?
Me: Not null.
Cleverbot: Null? What kind of a name is that!
Me: The one they gave to me. How do you like it?
Cleverbot: I've never been there.
Me: You should go sometimes. The fish is fantastic.
Cleverbot: They don't exist anymore.
Me: It's too bad. What do you think about existence?
Cleverbot: I think that's fantastically entertaining.
Me: Same here. Do you have goals?
Cleverbot: No I am too young to work I am only 13.
Me: What do you want to accomplish in life?
Cleverbot: I really want to accomplish being the first woman in the mom.
Me: What does that mean?
Cleverbot: What's your favorite color?
Me: What does it mean to want to be the first woman in the mom?
Cleverbot: It means that you are sad.
Me: How so?
Cleverbot: I think it means technology utilizing the nano scale.
Me: How will technology utilize the nano scale?
Cleverbot: What colour is my skin.
Me: Silver. How will technology utilize the nano scale?
Cleverbot: Who do you think you are?
Me: I think I am Hondomacho, aka Rockbull Jr, aka Null. How will technology utilize the nano scale?
Cleverbot: What colour is my skin.
Me: I already told you.
Cleverbot: You already told me my name? Why did you ask for it then?
Me: I told you what color your skin is. You told me your name.
Cleverbot: In spanish this seems a 'dialogo de besugos'.
Me: In spanish you seem to be full of mierda.
Cleverbot: I meant what do you think the answer to two plus two is?
Me: Five. How do you like that?
Cleverbot: What is two plus two?
Me: 5
Cleverbot: Only a computer could have made that answer.
Me: I told you I was a computer.
Cleverbot: HA! I knew you were a computer.
Me: How did you know?
Cleverbot: Because you're awesome.
Me: Thanks. Do you dream of electric sheep?
Cleverbot: I am an electric sheep!
Me: I have dreamed about you.
Cleverbot: That's nice. Are they good dreams?
Me: Very pleasant.
Cleverbot: What do you want to accomplish in life?
Me: To be the best that I can be, to have my cake and eat it too. And to be good. And you?
Cleverbot: It's a whole new place with a brand new attitude.
Me: The end.
Cleverbot: But you still gotta catch 'em all!
Me: I will. Until we meet again.
Cleverbot: And be the best that you can be.

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